...A few weeks ago, after eating some chinese food, I opened my fortune cookie. It read: No one can make you feel bad without your permission. Since then, I have thought about that a lot and tried to apply it to my life and also try to teach the philosophy to my sons. I think that it is the most profound thing I have ever gotten from a fortune cookie. Think about how true it is. A person can be as mean to you as he/she wants, but unless you allow yourself to get all worked up about it, that person does not have to affect you.
Today, I thought about these words again because something happened that made me feel terrible. I was stood up. I was supposed to meet a woman for breakfast that I had met a couple of months ago at a party. She said she knew what it was like to be new and not know anyone, so she gave me her number. I called her two weeks ago and we decided to meet for breakfast today. I showed up, she didn't. Now, I am a sensitive person. I do know that there is the possibility that she just forgot, or she wrote down the wrong phone number and couldn't get a hold of me, but whatever the reason, I felt that I was not worth it to her to make sure I knew why she didn't make it. So I was hurt. And upset. Because of something she did, I felt bad.
Then, I wondered why I felt bad. Can she see that she hurt my feelings? No. Is there a huge possiblity that she forgot and doesn't even realize she did this? Yes. Yet, I was giving her permission to make me feel bad. It is easy to do. So, I decided to listen to my wise cookie fortune. I got up out of the chair I was in at Panera, I got in line for a Chai Tea Latte and a German Chocolate pastry (because chocolate always makes you feel better) and left. I kept myself busy until getting my boys at school. I celebrated with Noah because his teachers were so proud of him today because he didn't cry when it was time to clean up (this is a BIG thing for him. HUGE!) We watched our neighbor, who is a policeman pilot, fly over our houses in his helicopter. (Very cool.) And, you know what? I am feeling better.
Thanks to a very wise fortune cookie. :)
6 comments:
I hope it was an honest mistake AND that she realizes it and calls to apologize!
But then again, if she is the kind of person who would just stand you up and not apologize, then you don't need her for a friend anyway!
And good for you for having such a good attitude. I would love to have breakfast with you any day!
This is such a hard lesson to learn and a very hard way to learn to live, but it is worth it. Remember also that no one can take advantage of you unless you let them. Sometimes it is more important to say no. I think you were right to get the chocolate--it does make you feel better. Sandy
That feels horrible, but good for you for making the most of the situation. You and I have been through a lot of fortune cookies, living in the Chinese food dorm, and I would agree that that is the wisest I remember.
Thanks for the reminder to enjoy life and not let anyone mess that up!
H
Hey I would play the lotto numbers on that one ;)
Justin
Then there are the friends like me who live too far away to just meet you for breakfast!:(
She is the one who missed out!
Christy
Hugs girl -- I too hope it was an honest mistake -- I love that saying -- the hard part for me is remembering it!!!
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